Location: Friendswood, Texas, United States

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Strange feelings

When the person who I had for years regarded as my soul-mate dumped me, he said it was apparent I wanted more from the relationship that he was capable of giving. He'd previously said he wanted a permanent, committed relationship, he brought me to England to meet his parents, gave me a display plate for my wall so that "we could start a collection like his parents", was bringing my kids and myself to house shop with him... He brought me to a really nice restaurant and said that I was "just like all the others" and he never intends to gets married or even live with someone. He didn't ever want to be a burden to anyone as he got older (and other poor excuses). I was devastated. That was four or five years ago. I recently got this e-mail from him.

Hi _______ -

I thought I would tell you my latest news before it is heard elsewhere in BARC.

Carolyn and I became engaged to be married in January - wedding was going to be November, but I was keen to bring it up to April - so, what do you know, miracles never cease to happen! Another confirmed bachelor bites the dust!

It is meant to be a small wedding and I'm not inviting BARC members so I have not mentioned it to any of them, but I wanted you to know. If you eventually hear it from them, you can tell them that that news is old history.

I was amazed to hear _my daughter___'s rowing achievements again last night. You must be very proud of her. And then to hear that she has the scholarship place in ______ University - great stuff. I will have to see those medals she won some day, before she swamps them with further trophies that she will no doubt be collecting.

Trust all is well with you and _my son_ is doing well at college.

My warmest regards,

"The Brit"

Wow! He is 52, has never been married and previously told me that his plans were to retire between 60 and 65 and move back to England. He's always been self employed or managed start-up companies. Now he is desperate to get a job in corporate America. Carolyn has never been married or had children, is maybe 35.... I feel devastated all over again. At the same time, an incredible resignation. Like, there really is no hope for me. I believe that I'd expected him to realize what a wonderful thing we had and how well suited to each other we are...but now, there is no point to hoping.